I miss you

If I could turn time back I would
but not for the reason you think
If I could turn time back I would
just to spend a few moments with you
I am not magic nor could I endure
all the things that you've gathered
I'm not your miracle cure
But I would to go back
and spend a few hours or days
if I could
with you just with you
To listen what you have to say
to hear what you have heard
and see what you see
just because I want to
and you mean that much to me
you were always so easy to get to laugh
and if I said something odd
or a little crude
you would look at me and say, "Oh my"
and we'd both laugh until we cry
Now I just cry
I want to sit beside you again
I want to make you laugh again
like I used to in the good old days
In my car, the one you loved so much
We drove for a long, long time
only to end up a few miles from home
even though we drove all night long
I remember once we drove
in the early morn
due west fast and far
in the early morn
just to turn around and drive back
into the bright morning sun
on that early morn
God we felt alive
boy we sure had a lot of fun
laughing on that early morn
in the morning sun
I loved you then and I love you now
I wish that I
could reach out now
reach out now
and touch your hand
or hold you tight
take you out of the
eternal night
I never ever can recall
any harsh words or anger
none at all
I never heard you say
or ever wish anyone bad
I guess if I were to take a poll
you'd be the kindest friend I ever had
If I could turn back time
I would I'm sure
to spend more time with you
than I did before
The people you touched are so many
and we all sure miss you right now
If I could turn back time I would
to spend a few more moments with you
and also to allow
you a few moments
the ones that you choose, too
It's selfish perhaps
but I can't help myself
I've tried to put you on a shelf
I can't believe you're gone
How can I tell you
or let you know
that I'm sorry we lost touch
and you had to go
I miss you, we miss you
I love you, we love you
please wait till you see me
or hear my name
I'm hoping you get this,
until we meet again.

In life and in dreams
everything is not as it seems

The back 'o' my hand

Back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand to the back'o'your head
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
No more cookies, no more treats
Get out of the jar, get it through your head
Or the back'o'my hand is what you'll get
No more pudding, no more sweets
Life is bitter, too bitter to swallow
Get out of the jar, this ain't no time to wallow
Or the back'o'my hand is what you'll get

It's for your own good, I hope you understand
The back'o'my hand that is, back'o'my hand
It's for your own good, I hope realize
that I only mean well, though now you may despise
me but you'll thank me later
for the back'o'my hand
Back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand to the back'o'your head
back'o'my hand is what you'll get

You may feel lucky and you may be right and
you may even put up a good fight
but you ain't seen but half of it yet
no sense in ducking, if the right don't get you
then the left will and there ain't no place
for you to hide, ready or not here I come
Back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand to the back'o'your head
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
Life is bitter, too bitter to swallow
Get out of the jar, this ain't no time to wallow
Or the back'o'my hand is what you'll get

It's for your own good, I hope you understand
The back'o'my hand that is, back'o'my hand
It's for your own good, I hope realize
that I only mean well, although right you despise
me but you'll thank me later
for the back'o'my hand
Back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand is what you'll get
Back'o'my hand, back'o'my hand
back'o'my hand.

Sevens and elevens

Thrown down
like a king without a crown
Thrown down
without a thought
without a care
Thrown down
I see sevens and elevens
rolling everywhere
craps all around
Thrown down
turn the throne
upside down
Thrown down
Who are you
to critizize me
who are you to say
what you think I feel
who are you
you're not real
I did my best
to impress you
I did my best
only to be thrown
with the rest
Thrown down
like a king without a crown
Thrown down
without a thought
without a care
Thrown down
I see sevens and elevens
rolling everywhere
sevens and elevens
craps all around
sevens and elevens
Thrown down
Thrown down
It's time go double
or nothing
leave it all downtown
leave it all thrown down
thrown down
sevens and elevens
thrown down
all thrown down
sevens and elevens

A little bit at a time

A little bit at a time,
take it easy baby,
I think we'll be fine.
A little bit at a time,
take a deep breath,
I think we'll be fine.
A little bit at a time,
take it easy baby,
try not to take too much.
Love is a drug
you can't take too much
at one time
Love is a drug
do not take it lightly
Get off my chest
I can breathe again
I think we'll be fine
Look i the mirror
Can you see the wind
blowing through your hair
A little bit at a time
Take it easy baby
I think we'll be fine
Look between the words
and the rhyme
Look in the mirror
Take a deep breath
make it mine
We will be fine
Look in the mirror baby
Look in the mirror
I see you but do you see me
Take it easy baby
But take it while you can
Take it easy baby
A little bit at a time
Take it easy baby
Take it while you can
Take it easy baby
A little bit at a time.

The inside

Life! Ha!
None of it really
matters much to me
It hurts like hell that's for sure
but what I will say is this
that my life is just that way
riding high all the time
on a suicide drive-by
every day
My mind's a mess
My heart's fucked up
The harder I try to
to get my shit together
I more I hear
the same old words again
I can't believe it
I can't believe my ears
Makes me wanna quit
quit it all
everyone and everything.

What I have got
If I don't have love
I close my eyes and sleep
won't come
The dreams that you have
are nightmares to me
My fears chase me
into the night
I feel alone with you
right there beside me
I feel dark and cold
I feel old
There's so much I need
to do yet
There's so much I need
to say yet
There's so much I need
to love yet
Don't take my love away.

Spinning in a funnel
unable to grab hold
a downward spiral
I feel cold
Unable to grab hold
sometimes the end
looks better
even better than
starting over again
Perhaps it's wrong to feel
this way
but my opinion is all
I have today
It matter so much
to me today
The hurt cut so deep
there's no blood
Take to corpse away.

Another heart torn out
another death by love today
I could care
but I don't
Crack a nut
you break the shell
I'm about the inside
I am the inside
This shell you see
is not me
I'm not this, that, these or those
I'm about the inside
I'm about what I chose.

Undo the done

When the echo fades
the barrel is silent
it cools to cold
Lying on the ground
no longer growing old
warm to cold
A split second
etched in time forever
It's impossible to
undo the permanent
to undo the done
When the echo fades
the barrel is silent
hot becomes cold
lying on the ground
no longer growing old
warm becomes cold
the story ends
but there's no longer two
there's only one
not two sides
there's not two sides
to be told
A split second
etched in time forever
it's impossible to
it's impossible to
it's impossible to
it's impossible to
to undo the permanent
to undo the done
to undo the done
It's impossible to
to undo the done
it's impossible to undo
what you have done...

Electric Blue

Let me tell you how clouds taste
Like tears, like the ocean
Clouds taste like the sea
Like you and me, I know it's true
Because when it rains
it tastes a little bit like me
and a little bit like you.

Like a butterfly on a moon beam
Through the shadows of the planets
Across the forests of the universe
Your love has come to me
Gently floating down on me
with an iridescent glow
sparkling at the tip of each hair
tingling and teasing
Until finally I am enveloped
completely
I feel electric blue
energized by you
The heavens are filled with clouds
I am electric blue
energized by you
eyes open wide
I feel you inside
electric blue
Drinking the nectar
wine of the clouds.

Anticipation of you
every tear that you cry
every drop that you perspire
Let me tell you how clouds taste

Let me tell you how clouds taste
Clouds taste like tears, like the ocean
Clouds taste like the sea
They taste like you and me
I know it's true
Because when it rains
it tastes a little bit like me
and a little bit like you, too.

The Garden

The garden is growing
It’s taking over the yard
When I take care of it
it always works me hard
The lawn is now filled
with flowering weeds
At least six feet in height
Creeping ivy and clematis’
stop the windows from opening
and block out all the light
The trees have dropped seeds
that grew into trees
That dropped more seeds
and grew more trees
In which nest
thousands of birds
and millions of bees
I can’t see the clouds
nor the sky for the trees
I can’t hear a thing
except for the birds in the trees
and the buzzing of bees
The garden has taken control
of the house and my life
There’s no path or walkway
No way in or out
Hidden by the foliage
Camouflaged from life
The background is the foreground
As the front yard is the back
A world within the world
Living a world apart
Separated by a crack
Free to go at any time
But trapped inside
the choice was mine
I’ve tried to leave
to ride away
Like a drop of rain rides the river
But when this drop of rain
completes the course
It will have meandered back
to its source
No matter how far
I seem to roam
The garden manages to beckon me
back home
The garden is taking over
It may look overgrown
or like it’s taken over the yard
and my home
But when I take care of it
it always works me hard.

Love costs so much

I hear and I see
But it’s all so confusing to me
The long whip of
Her eye lashes
Cools me down as
The car crashes
Long since that day
There’s been so much to say
But time carries on
Like the words to a song
That you’ve yet to hear
Waiting and anticipating
For a word for a clue
What should you do
A change of heart
A different scene
Someplace you’ve never seen
No time for reflection
Or to pretend
Love costs more
It costs more in the end
Cold harsh words
Run out across your
Blistering lips
Warm blood trickles
Between your fingertips
How come love always costs so much
It costs so much more in the end
The things I hear and I see
They are so confusing to me
The long whip of
Her eye lashes
Cools me down as
The car crashes
Long since that day
There’s been so much to say
But time carries on
Like the words to this song
That you’ve never heard
Yeah
She takes me places that I’ve never been before
She drives me crazy like no other has before
I lay naked beside her, on the kitchen floor
I think of her until I can’t think any more
She shows me things that I’ve never seen before
So tell me
How come
Love always cost so much
So tell me
How come
Love always cost so much
It always seems to cost so much
Love always costs so much
It always costs so much
In the end
In the end
In the end
The end

Seasons Change

Sprite pace of wind draws clouds in from the west
Birds fly off in silence aware of the test

Leaves placed all around by autumns roughhewn care
Crisp and brittle now that winter’s in the air

The augment the darkness and shadows disappear
Squirrels scurry gathering nuts as the inclemency gets near

Mother Nature waits on no one when she brings a change about
She quickly brings the winter in and pushes autumn out.

Stargazing

Next time you’re bored not sure what to do
If it’s late at night here’s what you do

You step outside and look up through night air
What you’ll see is wonderful, a vast galaxy there

Pretend you’re an artist, the stars are your tools
The night sky’s your canvas, there are no rules

As you gaze to the north, to the south, east and west
Each view’s a masterpiece, which one is best

Once you’ve decided try blinking your eyes
A new picture formed with each of your tries

Dawn is arriving, you’re spent but feeling fine
You’re awaiting the dusk to try one more time.

It feels like I'm dying

Oh babe, it feels... like I'm dying
I swear that it's true...I ain't lying
Oh babe, oh won't you hold me now

I think I'm dying
It feels like I'm dying
I feel pain in my body, I ain't never felt before
Oh baby please...I'm at your feet, on the floor
Sometimes I feel good
I feel much better than I should
Sometimes I feel so damn good
You know when baby
I think that you know
exactly and you know...
You know when I feel good
But listen to me baby
listen to me honeychild
It has been a long time
it has been a while
Oh babe it feels... like I'm dying
I swear that it's true, I ain't lying
Come over here by me
Come closer to me, my sweet little thing
And listen to me cuz...I ain't lying
Oh babe it feels... like I'm dying
I swear that it's true...I ain't lying
Oh babe, it feels... like I'm dying
I swear that it's true...I ain't lying
Oh babe, oh won't you hold me I'm dying
It feels like I'm dying

The blood red strand

just up ahead
right where they stand
is a line drawn
in the sand
shoulder to shoulder
they stood each man
as we moved closer
they stood firm
we could almost see their eyes
when I saw the first one
I felt the fever rise
I knew it was him
by he look in his eyes
the first one's mine I shouted
and began the attack
onward to victory came my cries
and with a swirl of my sword
and a deep lunging thrust
I killed my brother for all of his lies
I stopped for a moment
as I pulled out my sword
why my brother, why my Lord
the line drawn in the sand
the blood red strand
where we once stood hand in hand
two young boys fishing
two young boys wishing
on the future
laughing about our lives
and our future wives
two young boys
two brothers
the blood red strand
why did it happen
why did you leave
this place your homeland
we never did get along
but never fought at all
to desert your family
your Mother, Father and Brother
to desert us all
and your friends
for fame and riches
to be worshipped
and bejeweled
we were brought up to believe
that people cannot be ruled
and used by keeping them in fear
why my brother, why my Lord
and how did we get to here
the line drawn in the sand
the blood red strand

making the right decisions in life can be the most devasting...sometimes involving the hurting of those we love most

Pennies for Peace

each penny comes with a thought
each penny is not a lot
a penny is not wealth
a penny is often left behind, on the shelf
to us that penny means not a lot
but a penny is more than what some got
think of each penny
put a thought into each penny
so each penny comes with a thought
make sure to leave them on the shelf
give reminder to yourself
put all those pennies in one spot
think of what, with all those pennies, can be bought
pennies mean a lot
when you haven't any
not one penny
each penny comes with a thought
let that thought be
what can be bought
with all the pennies for peace!

The same man

To tell you the truth
I never thought I'd end up like this
So far from everything
So long from everywhere
As a child I always prayed
Opened my heart to heaven above
I gave what I could
I gave all my love
But something is wrong here
So far from everything
So long from everywhere
To tell you the truth
I never thought I'd end up like this
It's a long road home
It's so long when you're all alone
So far from everything you know
So long from everywhere you go
Far away, far too far away
And it's getting further every day
To tell you the truth
I never thought I'd end up this way
It's such a long road home
It's so long when you're all alone
It's long way home
When you've gone so far
You can't turn back
Stay straight and narrow
Cling to today for tomorrow
For tomorrow will be your today
To tell you the truth
I never thought I'd end up this way
Lying in bed
Those thoughts in my head
Thoughts of life
Thoughts of the future
It's been so long
And soon you'll be dead
Those thoughts thought
Were not like this
Those thoughts thought
Would never be like this
So why is it like this
We never thought like this
We didn't want this
To tell you the truth
I never thought we'd end like this

Waking up
Lying on the floor
In warm pool of blood
I didn't do it
I wasn't even there
How can this be
Let me go I have to go now
I have to see
As I look down
On the floor now
I see me
Waking up
Lying on the floor
In a warm pool of blood
Lying beside me
I see them
Each and every last one
I reach to touch
But they run from me now
I want to but can't help
I don't even know who I am
I reach out to help them
But now they are gone

Waking up
Lying on the floor
In warm pool of blood
I didn't do it
I wasn't even there
How can this be
Let me go, I have go now
I have to see
And as I look down
On the floor now
I see me
Waking up
Lying on the floor
In a warm pool of blood

Turn your head up
Turn your head up to the sky
Reach out to the Heavens
Reach way up high
It's funny how you can
It's funny to be this man
The same man
Though you may not know
Till your dying day
It's the same man
The same song
You know the words
How it goes
You've done it all
You've sung this song
Once before
It's history repeating itself
Like it has
In the past
It's history
Yes it's history repeating itself

To tell you the truth
I never thought I'd end up like this
So far from everything
So long from everywhere
As a child I always prayed
Opened my heart to heaven above
So help me now
Sing a song so we may be reborn
The same song we sung before
Same song as we sung before
Before the time
Before the day
Sing the song
Sing this all away...
Sing a song so we may be reborn

Turn your head up
Turn your head up to the sky
Reach out to the Heavens
Reach way up high
It's funny how you can
It's funny to be this man
The same man
Though you may not know
Till your dying day
It's the same man
The same song
You know the words
How it goes
You've done it all
You've sung this song
Once before
It's history repeating itself
Like it has
In the past
It's history
Yes it's history repeating itself
Sing that song
I'll sing along
Sing a song to be reborn...

using confusion you can find peace and quiet

Babylon Woes

I’ve got the banker on the phone
He wants money for the loan
The mortgage is due
The car needs service too
What the hell are we going to do?
I won’t give up, that’s not my style
I just wish they’d all ease up for a while
Give us some room, some air to breathe
I’ll make good on it all, the intent is there
I’m not one to cheat or deceive
I wish that all our problems
were much smaller than they are
The house paid off, perhaps a new car
If I could
You know that I would
change my life
In whatever way
To suit our every need
With a little more we’d be in the black
Almost at lightning speed
Is it bad luck we’re having now
or perhaps bad timing
put us in this kowtow
The taxes, the visa
Bills for this
Pay for that
Life just costs too much
We’re constantly paying a toll
I wonder how our parents ever made it
I feel so out of control
The harder I work
the less I get paid
At the end of the week I search
for the money I made
I want the best for the family
Cars, food and clothes
But to get from here to there
is what puzzles me
living in Babylon woes.

The Sumer civilization developed a large scale economy based on commodity money. The Babylonians and their neighboring city states later developed the earliest system of economics as we think of it today, in terms of rules on debt, legal contracts and law codes relating to business practices and private property. These law codes dated 1760 BC formalized the role of money in civil society. They set amounts of interest on debt... fines for 'wrong doing'... and compensation in money for various infractions of formalized law.
In 604 B.C.E, the Babylonian ruler...Nebuchadnezzar...decreed that gold would be the medium of exchange in his empire. The Babylonian temples contained strong rooms where people brought their gold and other precious items for safekeeping by the temple priests. The customers were given small clay tablets as receipts for their valuables.
The priest-bankers demanded that the people pay twenty percent interest for guarding their valuables--not a bad racket. Some Swiss banks today charge interest for securing deposits. But most modern banks pay depositors interest on the money they keep in their accounts.
The Babylonian priests, never letting the grass grow under their feet, discovered that most of the people depositing valuables for safekeeping seldom came to reclaim their gold and other precious items. Instead, the people began using the clay receipt tablets as a means of exchange--money.
Now, thought the priests, the people believe that the clay tablets are backed by gold and other valuables, yet the deposits are seldom if ever claimed. We can issue ten times as many clay tablets as are backed by gold and grow rich. The priest-bankers issued clay tablets unredeemable by gold, loaned out the clay tablets at interest and were soon living the life of luxury.
The crafty Babylonian priests had invented all the features of modern full-service banking:
-Custody of money: gold and other precious objects in safekeeping in the temple vaults
-The issuing of currency (something in circulation as a means of exchange): clay tablets
-The charging of interest: money charged by banks for securing a depositor's money or money charged for a loan
-The loaning of money: loaning of clay tablets at interest
-The issue of fiat money: money not convertible into a commodity (such as gold or silver) of equivalent value--un-secured clay tablets
But let's not forget old Nebuchadnezzar, he invented two important stratagems which have lasted through the centuries: The technology of war & State fiscal policy

A prayer for wellness

so shall it be
let it be, let it be
may the great spirit be with you
as he is with me
may he guide you
as he guides me
may the great spirit be with you
as he is with me
let him be beside you
as he is beside me
let him inside you
as he is inside us all
at night may he lay beside you
and in your dreams guide you
you have the strength
with the great spirit to guide you
may your fears be bad dreams
may your hopes become your life
may the great spirit be with you
may he guide you
may the great spirit be with you
as he walks beside you
all the waters and forests shall open
all the fish, birds, animals and you
speak the language that the spirit speaks too
a deep connection with Mother Earth
with each new baby born
comes another cow or bull
and a fish and one row of corn
may the great spirit be with you
may he walk you through your life
may the great spirit be with you
be beside you and may he guide you
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
help me
oh great spirit
let it be
let it be
let it be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
may the great spirit be with you
great spirit also be with me
may the great spirit be within you as you go
great spirit also be within me as I go
may the great spirit be beside you as you go in peace
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
let it be
let it be
let it be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
so it shall be
may the great spirit be with you
may the great spirit be within you as you go
may the great spirit be beside you as you go in peace

as we walked through the beautiful and endless gardens at the Amphitheatre, with each step I felt more relaxed and at home. I could hear chanting from a long time ago, I could see children laughing,running and playing being told to slow down and listen the elder speaking...

Close the door

Close the door, close it tight
It’s not right
The weather’s not right
Not tonight
To fly a kite
There’s a storm brewing
And I’m not sure
Not sure what I’m doing
Strange as that may seem
Like thoughts in a dream
That keeps getting stranger by the minute
Like water only gets cold when you’re in it
Close the door, close it tight
It’s not right
The weather’s not right
Not tonight
To fly a kite
There’s a storm brewing
And I’m not sure
Not sure what I’m doing
But I do know
I know that it’s not right
Something’s not right
Not right tonight
It’s not right
The weather’s not right
Not tonight
To fly a kite
There’s a storm brewing
And I’m not sure
Not sure what I’m doing
So close the door, close it tight
Because something isn’t right
Tonight

Stoggy

Hauled back on a stoggy
Last one that I got
Took a sip of sherry
Man that hit the spot
Sittin is the life
But it sure ain’t easy
It can pay you well if you try
But I just ain’t that sleazy
I ain’t no king
Just a man on the road
I ain’t got no throne
No fancy clothes
All I got and need
Is on my back
I ain’t got me no Cadillac
All I got
Is all I need
And like I said
I wear on my back
No books, no movies
No magazines
No records or 45's
For them fancy record playin'machines
Life sure ain’t easy
And I ain’t no king
I got what I got
I don’t need me no other thing
I’m just a man on the road
And I ain’t got no throne
And no fancy clothes
All I got and need
Is on my back
I ain’t got me no Cadillac
All I got
Is all I need
And like I said
I wear on my back
I guess I best be walking
To a busier part of town
Where there’s more folks
There’s usually smokes
Stoggy’s on the ground
Hauled back on a stoggy
Last one that I got
Took a sip of sherry
Man that hit the spot
Stoggy’s on the ground
Quarters in the pot.

I remember sitting on the bench where the streetcar stop was and listening to the old time buskers and bums or hobos talking, and also sitting on the stoop of the local hotel, I'll never forgot those days and those people

Good Mourning

I wake up in the morn and mourn
I mourn about my pain
About the shape I’m not in
I beat myself up
I mentally abuse myself
Until I have the strength
Until I can check to see
The parts of me that work
And feel fine
and the parts of me
That don’t work so well
Or perhaps even quit
I spend my morning mourning
Feeling sorry for myself
Reaching slowly for
The pills on the shelf
I used to take them for pleasure
I took them for fun
Now I take them because I have to
Because I can no longer run
It’s appalling
I’m crawling
Itching and scratching
To the point of pain
and I’m sprawling
Hurting deep inside
I would if I could shed my skin,
Like a lizard or snake
To be who and what I am
And to loosen the fake
Shed the old skin and all the pain
That which was old is young again
But life’s not like that
Not even for reptiles
You can revive the outside
But you can’t hide the miles
I spend part of every day
Wishing I could take away
The past, the times
For which I now pay for
Each and every day for
The older I get the higher the cost
Sometimes I forget or get lost
Between the pills I have to take
In order to remain the fake
I have to be to make
The best of what, I’m not sure
At times I know I’m too much
At times I’m not sure how much
More even I can take
How much longer I can be fake.

two paths

two paths that run parallel
at times per chance they meet
those times, like moments of passion
those times taste so sweet
sometimes meeting often
and sometimes hardly at all
those times are like a pillow
a pillow to break the fall
life is never fair it seems
so unlike the life in dreams
so like the paths that someday meet
with moments of passion
and love so sweet
let me be the pillow that lay by your feet

Carry me Home

Carry me home
Carry me home
For I can drink no more
Carry me home
Carry me home
I can knee see the floor
Hey pretty girl
wow you look great
and you’re sure no lady
But I like your taste in men
Come on baby
Carry me home
Carry me home again
Come on pretty baby
Carry me home
Carry me home again
Come on baby carry me home again
I was heading for the door
When I had just one more
And I had just another and
One more for the road
One for me heading towards the door
Oh pretty darlin' carry me home
just once more
Carry me home
Carry me home
just
once
more...

I ne'er seen a lassie
quite the likes of you
If were knee drunk...
Oh pretty darlin' carry me home
just once more
Carry me home
Carry me home
just
once
more.

To the bone again

What was I thinking
This can't be real
Bring on the night
bring on the pain
I've had too much
happiness once again.

My skin feels itchy
Crawling deep inside
If I could
I’d tear it off
Peel off my own hide
No longer able to hide
My feet are hot
So uncomfortable
If I could
I’d cut them off
No longer able to run
My body feels different
Sick and tired
It belongs to someone else
I feel odd, out of sorts
Not quite like myself today
If I could
I’d find myself today
Another me today
Another me to be
Another way today.

Looking through my window
Not sure what I see
Searching for something
But it’s not there for me
Shadows falling
In my direction
Streaks upon the glass
Memories of you rush in
And then they quickly pass
Streaks upon the glass
from the tears I have cried
over the lost love passed.

Reminders of all the times
we have both tried
Rays of sadness
As the sun begins to fade
Radiate in the silence
Echo the mistakes that we made.

Driven by a drive
Driven once before
Driven to a place
Driven to a door
Angels all around
What are they here for
The questions are gone
Same answer as before.

Bring on the night
And let it rain
Give it all to me
Tear out my heart
Run me over again.

I guess I was dreaming
Living with no pain
It lasted far too long
What was I thinking
It was bound to break
Happiness seems
too much to take
Bring on the night
Dark is my light
And now the rain
Make it cold and hard
Like my heart
Hit by a train
I guess I was dreaming
I must have been dreaming
again
Living life far too long
without pain
Bring on the night
bring on the pain
take it to the bone
again.

The turn around

Oh hey it came to me today
For lately I've thinking
It seems to me that I'm dying
And it's been happening for some time
Now, I know that time is flying
Fleeting past us despite all of our trying
We can't slow it down or make it stop
We can't do it for love
We can't do it the name of God
But, oh hey it came to me today
Because lately I've been thinking
It seems obvious I am dying
And it's been happening for some time
And it's happening today
Slowly death creeps
Like acid it seeps
Everything it takes it keeps
It weakens my in the knees
It strengthens with all of my pleas
There's no more innocence
I've done and said it
Dear God
It came to me today
But I've been thinking all along
That I am dying
I have said and done things
I have taken you in vain
I have forgotten my faith
In my own words
I should be forgiving
even in pain
But I felt alone and forsaken
My mind and body were swallowed and taken
By the anger and fear
Of the uncertainty of here
When it came to me today
That I may be dying
But I'm still here
I may have pain
and my finger on the trigger
but the love I feel is bigger
I feel so alone
but I can still smile
even through all of the pain
I'm not alone it seems
None of us will ever be the same
We all grow old and have pain
But when it yours it means more
It hurts much more
Then you can explain
It pains you more
than a neighbour next door
Compassion and sympathy
don't make it go away
they don't really mean a thing
until you can say you've been there
and felt things the same way
And it makes you say
Hey, I was thinking
And it came to me today
It feels so good to be alive
Let's celebrate another good day
We can go out for a walk
Or grab a coffee
Still it's a good day
No matter what way
As long as we're alive and well
until you can say you've been there
and felt things the same way
And it makes you say
Hey, I was thinking

Something about the rain

Rain fell down upon us like tears from up above
I felt the sky crying, it heard about our broken love

You said you’d never leave me and promised to be true
But when I saw you kissing him it broke my heart in two

Honey why’d you do it
Why’d you kiss him
Hug him
Hold him too

Honey, you know I can do those things much better than he can for you
Honey gimme just one more chance and I'll prove it to you

Honey why’d you do it
Why’d you kiss him
Hug him
Hold him too

Honey, you know I can do those things much better than he can for you

Rain fell down upon us like tears from up above
I felt the sky crying, I heard about our broken love
We both promised to be faithful at least that’s what we said
To share our love forever, when we made love in our bed

Honey why’d you do it
Why’d you kiss him
Hug him
Hold him too

Honey, you know I can do those things much better than he can for you
Honey why’d you do it
Why’d you kiss him
Hug him
Hold him too

Honey, you know I can do those things much better than he can for you

Rain fell down upon us like tears from up above
I felt the sky crying, I heard about our broken love

It’s been a year now since we parted and my heart will always be with you
Though I wander through my life I still can’t believe it’s true

Honey why’d you do it
Why’d you kiss him
Hug him
Hold him too

Cuz, honey I would do those things much better then he ever can ever for you
Cuz, honey I would do those things much better then he ever can ever for you

Now the rain falls down on me like tears from up above
The sky is crying, cuz it heard of our broken love
The sky is crying, cuz it heard of our broken love
Yes I know the sky is crying cuz it heard
Of
Our broken love.

Is

IS INNOCENCE, LIKE A NEWBORN CHILD
IS TRUSTING, NOT AFRAID TO LET GO
IS PATIENCE, IN WAITING
IS FORGIVENESS, EVEN IN PAIN
IS AWARENESS, WITHOUT DEFENSE
IS FEELING, THE LOVE YOU FEEL
IS DEVOTION, AS DEEP AS WATER GOES
IS FREEDOM, TO BE YOURSELF
IS ECSTASY, THROUGH THE AGONY
IS HUMILITY, WHEN ON YOUR PLATE
IS PURE, AND SWEET
IS FULFILLMENT, WHEN YOU’RE NEAR
IS BEAUTY, IN THE EYES OF THE BEHOLDER
IS HARMONY, AND YOU ARE THE MELODY
IS PASSION, AT TIMES UNCONTROLLABLE
IS SURRENDER, AT FREE WILL
IS HONESTY, STRAIGHT FROM THE HEART
IS LOYALTY, NEVER LED ASTRAY
IS WISDOM, GROWING BETTER WITH AGE
IS UNSELFISH, ALWAYS WORTH SHARING
IS TOLERANCE, OF WHATEVER MAY COME TO BE
IS ONE, IS ALL
IS ETERNAL, YOUNG AT HEART
IS LOVE, NEVER ENDING
IS YOU AND ME

Life has no meaning

OIL IN OUR WATER
FISH NOWHERE TO BE FOUND
THE MODERN DAY MURDERER
SEEPS POISON INTO THE GROUND

FOSSIL FUEL EMISSIONS
HANG HEAVY IN THE AIR
BLATANT SIGNS OF WASTEFULNESS
AND DECADENCE EVERYWHERE

TOXIC WASTE STORED AND DUMPED EVERYWHERE
BIGGER ENGINES AND BIGGER CARS
PUMP EVEN MORE POISON INTO OUR AIR
DO WE REALLY NEED WHAT WE HAVE
AND DO WE EVEN CARE

THE ANSWERS ARE SIMPLE
AND THE SOLUTIONS THE SAME
WE DID THIS TO OURSELVES
LET'S TRY THIS ONCE AGAIN

THE FARMERS PLIGHT, THE WORKING CLASS
LESS FOOD THAN MOUTHS TO FEED
OUR CHILDREN, OUR PEOPLE ONE AND ALL
SUFFER FOR MANKIND’S GREED TO SUCCEED

THE WARS OVER SEAS THAT NOBODY SEES
PICTURES AND STORIES BEYOND BELIEF
OF TORTURE, DEATH AND GRIEF
DESENSITIZING US MORE EVERY DAY
AND OUR COMPASSION BEGINS TO FADE AWAY

THE KILLING FIELDS, OUR OWN PEACEFUL TOWNS
RAVAGED BY FEAR, DEATH AND PAIN
HELD HOSTAGES ARE WE, NEVER TO BE SET FREE
FROM THE CLUTCHES OF GREED'S BLOODY REIGN

OUR PURPOSE IN LIFE HAS NO MEANING
THOUGH WE ALL TRY HARD TO BELIEVE
BUT THE TRICK IS NOT TRYING, IT’S LIVING
TO GIVE EACH LIFE MEANING
BEFORE WE HAVE TO LEAVE

THERE'S NO SECRET TO OUR FUTURE
IT SHINES BRIGHTLY THROUGH ALL OF THIS
GET RID OF OPPRESSION AND DISCRIMINATION
EQUALITY FOR ONE AND ALL
TEAR DOWN ALL BOUNDARIES AND BORDERS
EVERY FENCE AND EVERY WALL

ONE PEOPLE, ONE CAUSE
ONE WORLD, ONE NATION

THE UNIVERSE WILL BEAR ITS SOUL TO US
ONE PEOPLE WITH ONE GOAL IN TRUST
TO GO FORTH INTO THE REALM OF DARKNESS
AND THE UNKNOWN
BRINGING THE LIGHT OF PROSPERITY FOR ALL
AND MAKING THE WHOLE WORLD OUR HOME

IT'S A DREAM I HAVE
I HOPE SOMEDAY WILL COME TRUE
WITH A PEACEFUL COEXISTENCE FOR
THEM, US AND YOU.

Goodbye

GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
IT'S TIME WE SAID GOODBYE

YOU'RE SO BITCHY
YOU'RE DRIVING ME AWAY
YOU’RE SICK OF ME
AND NOW I’M SICK OF YOU
TOO...TODAY
I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE
WE CAN'T MAKE THIS
WORK
ANYMORE
I DON’T WANNA STAY HERE ANYMORE

GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
WHAT YOU LOSE
AND WHEN YOU LOSE IT
IS WHAT YOU CHOSE
AND WHEN YOU CHOSE IT
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE

YOU'RE TOO BITCHY
I’M GOING AWAY
YOU’RE SICK OF ME
I’M SICK OF YOU TOO
TODAY
I’M SICK OF YOU
TOO...TODAY
I DON'T WANT THIS ANYMORE
I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE
I DON’T WANNA STAY
I DON'T WANNA STAY HERE ANYMORE

GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
THERE’S NO BOTTOM
TO ANYTHING THAT WE DO
YOU’RE SO SICK OF ME
NOW I’M SICK OF YOU TOO

GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
WE’VE BOTH BEEN INSIDE THIS
FAR TOO LONG
AND THE POINT TO ALL THIS IS
I’M MOVING ON
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE

WE CAN'T TAKE IT
WE CAN'T MAKE IT ANYMORE
TIME TO MOVE ALONG

GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
WHAT YOU LOSE
AND WHEN YOU LOSE IT
IS WHAT YOU CHOSE
AND WHEN YOU CHOSE IT
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE
GOODBYE, GOODBYE, GOODBYE

An Army of One

If your mind is broken
Your body’s bent
And your weakest moment
Is heaven sent
Capture the light
Reach, lean and repent
Heaven breathes an army of angels
On every golden ray of sunshine
They are sent
As a glimmer, a glimpse
A flash in the pan
A faint hope
A leap of faith
The child within the man
The darkest moments
In the heart of night
Hold the secrets
To what makes the day bright
Embrace all your fears
Hold onto them tight
Your is left is left
But your wrong will be right
With Gods angels
You’re an army of one
Trust, faith and belief
Will be the weapons
When all is said and done.

THE TRUTH REMAINS

Bathe in the truth
FEEL THE PAIN...
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS

There it goes, leaving now
EXIT RESTRAINT
HONESTY'S SO COLD
LIES THEY DIE FAST
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
YOU TRY TO
FOLLOW YOUR OWN WAY BACK &
IN YOUR SEARCH FOR ANSWERS
YOU FIND QUESTION’S
HIDING
INSIDE YOU AGAIN

Bathed in truth
FEELING THE PAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
HONESTY’S SO COLD
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS

There it goes, leaving again
EXIT RESTRAINT
HONESTY IS COLD
LIES THEY DIE FAST
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
YOU TRY TO
FOLLOW YOUR OWN WAY BACK &
IN YOUR SEARCH FOR ANSWERS
YOU FIND QUESTION’S
STUPID QUESTIONS
QUESTIONS
HIDING
INSIDE YOU AGAIN

Drowned in truth
STILL I'M
FEELING THE PAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
THE PAST WASHES OFF
YES IT DOES
THE PAST WASHES OFF
YES IT DOES
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH
REMAINS

The truth remains

Bathe in truth
FEEL THE PAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS

THERE IT GOES, LEAVING NOW
EXIT RESTRAINT
HONESTY IS COLD
LIES DIE BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
FOLLOW YOUR OWN WAY BACK
IN YOUR SEARCH FOR ANSWERS
QUESTION’S INSIDE YOU AGAIN

Bathed in truth
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
FEELING THE PAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
HONESTY’S COLD
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS

IT’S BACK ONCE AGAIN
EXIT RESTRAINT
HONESTY IS COLD
LIES DIE BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
FOLLOW YOUR OWN WAY BACK
IN YOUR SEARCH FOR ANSWERS
QUESTION’S INSIDE YOU AGAIN

Bathed in truth
FEELING THE PAIN
HERE IT COMES AGAIN
THE PAST WASHES OFF

BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
THE PAST WASHES OFF
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS
BUT THE TRUTH REMAINS.

thoughts

Life is useless from beginning to end
With spasms and pain it begins
With pain and spasms it ends
Nothing more than a hot flash
in cold, cold world
Life is useless from beginning to end
Let us save our breath
For what is breath after all
But the beginning and the end
For breath delivers our first cry
And steals our last word
Life is useless from beginning to end

From here I have watched you
As you walked along the side of the street
where the light slices into the darkness
Silence follows you
Everything else is left behind
Your voice echoes
Your promise is a song
Your memory is sad

Who is the potter I say
Where is the pot
And where is the clay
His work's unfinished
Has he gone for the day
Just for today
From the belly of the Earth
came the clay
Came the clay he used
on that day
Listen in the evening
Listen and pray
That all will be well
in the morrow day
Who is the potter I say
Where is the pot
And where is the clay

Let injury heal
Let doubt find faith
Let there be hope in despair
let sadness become joy
Let love rule over hate
And let there be peace on Earth

thought # 999

If there was a button to push
If there were a button to push
To make it all go away
It there were a button to push
I'd push it today

With the flick of a switch
It's a brand new day
And all my pain fades away
I'm not a quitter
I can take it
I'm not a faker
I will make it
If there were a time to end it
If ever a day came to end it
To end it all and start over
Today was that day for me
I opened my eyes as usual
I took a deep breath as usual
I felt the pain as usual
I cried as usual
I tried as usual
I stood and cried
I thought my next move
I cried
I focused on the best of me
On the best parts of my life
My kids and my wife
I cried
The weight of my burden
Is too much
It's too much to carry
The guilt kills me slowly
I have become a job
I have become the thought
The special consideration
Not the vision I had
Not the vision I had
My future seems painfully bleak
One day passes like a week
The times I felt good are gone
I felt them as hard as I could
I lived my life accordingly
I did my best to be me
The times I felt good are gone
Will they ever come back
Will I ever break free
of the pain that bends
binds and chokes me
The pills I take seem dandy
like grown up candy
Some to sleep and eat
and take the pain away
and even some that make you randy
With the flick of a switch
It's a brand new day
I'm ten again and eating candy
No wait I'm sixteen
with a girl named Mandy
Life was good before the pain
I wish I could feel like that again
Pain is such a powerful motivation
It can crumble your mind and body
Pain can make you think and do things
you never thought or did before
Lash out in anger without concern
Expecting all to be normal
When your normal thoughts return
I can't function or concentrate
The pain is so bad I can't wait
To take more pills and medicate
My mind is a blender
filled with medicine and love
I've been upset
I've been lonely
I've been depressed
I've all those things enough
Enough to consider ending it
Suicide is such an awful thing
It's full of uncertainty
It's full of emptiness
I'm sure it's full
full of all the things
we want to escape
or is it wait
but that's the thing
you can't wait
there's is no second chance
Once done it's done
and there's no where to hide anymore
you are an open book
That is if you care
but if it were me
I'd clean up my closets
before heading there
So much to do
So many thoughts
Until I think about you
My love is dying for you
everyday crying for you
Then I think about this life
I have with you
It's never boring
when I'm in your arms
when I hear their voices
I know I'm near nirvana
at least what it is for me
I can't speak or think
as the pain moves
back in on me
but I know exactly
where I want to be
But being trapped
in this body
in this chair
in this house
unable to disable
what disables me

If there was a button to push
If there were a button to push
To make it all go away
It there were a button to push
I'd push it today

It's kinda like your hair

To stop from boiling
Remove carefully
To stop from boiling
Best take care
It's good
It's fine
Just stir it constantly
It's kinda like your hair
A pinch is 1/2 a teaspoon
Don't go using more
It's kinda like your hair
Too much is just that too much
too much
Too little you can add a touch
a touch a touch
It's kinda like your hair
Sample before serving
Until you've got it right
Sample before serving
And then he'll stay the night
To stop from burning
Turn down the heat
To stop from burning
You better take care
Remove from heat
It's kinda like your hair
Simmer for twenty minutes
Means not for one hour
Al dente instead puree
It's simple keep it that way
Keep smiling
It's the hardest thing to do
And keep smiling
And the world smiles with you
And keep smiling
When you think of me
And keep smiling
The silly things I do
To stop from boiling
Remove carefully
To stop from boiling
Best take care
It's good
It's fine
Just stir it constantly
It's kinda like your hair
It's kinda like your hair
It's kinda like your hair

Drift

Stuck in the water
Stuck between the waves
Close to shore
But slipping away
Slipping away
with each wave
Slipping away more
Drifting far away
Far away from the shore
Stuck in the water
Pushed out by the waves
I can't see the shore
Drifting out on the water
To where I've never been before
Drifting slowly
Drifting further and further
Drifting I hoped to another shore
The shimmering last light
Of a dying sunset
Glistening on the cold
clear water
Gave me hope as I drifted
into the night
The minutes of darkness
passed by like hours
Drifting like a lost soul
at night
Then through my eyes hardly open
as I glance the right
I see an elliptical sunrise
bringing warmth
ending the night
I have drifted
to I don't know where
I can't see the shore
anywhere anymore
I have drifted
Without direction
Without a care
I was unaware
Unprepared
Stuck in the water
Stuck between the waves
Close to shore
But slipping away
Slipping away
with each wave
Slipping away more
Drifting far away
I have drifted
to I don't know where
I can't see the shore
anywhere anymore
I have drifted
Far away
far too far away...
hope you drift my way
someday
today...

It don't come easy

It don't come easy
It ain't that hard to see
It don't come easy
In fact it don't come at all for me
I had a good life
But I gave it all away
I gave part of it to a needle
As for the rest
I cannot say
I have the heart of a young man
Bent broken and sore
I have the mind of a young man
I can't be him anymore
I could have met a woman
Instead I met myself
Somewhere between the needle
And the medicine on the shelf
It don't come easy
It ain't that hard to see
It don't come easy
In fact it don't come at all for me
I made decisions
and every day I pay
For the things I did
Mistakes I made
when choices came my way
I had a good life
But I gave it all away
It don't come easy
It ain't that hard to see
It don't come easy
In fact it don't come at all for me
I am stuck and frustrated
With the heart of a young man
Bent broken and sore
The mind of a young man
Who I can't be anymore
It don't come easy
It ain't that hard to see
It don't come easy
In fact it don't come at all for me
It don't come easy
It ain't that hard to see
It don't come easy
In fact it don't come at all for me
It don't come at all for me
No, no, no...
It don't come at all
for
me

The superimposer

The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
Entered the room
with
Strict exposure
which
Left me unsure
of
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
and who
It was I'm not sure
but showing
Lack of composure
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
that acted
Just like a soldier
Someone who
I know but I'm not sure
If it was
The superimposer
I've seen it
only once before
The very next day
They locked the door
And it was seen
no more
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
Entered the room
with
double exposure
which
Once again
Left me unsure
of
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
which
Once again
Left me unsure
of
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure
The superimposer
in the
Vestibule enclosure

Indian

When I grow up I want to be an Indian
I know this now for sure
I always played an Indian whenever we played outside
I always had the coolest gear and knew the best places to hide
I never felt a difference, in fact I felt the same
When I played an Indian as I did playing in any other game
I felt the best though when I dressed the part
And I got to be an Indian again in the yard or the park
It seemed to me they hardly spoke
But when they did they said a lot
When they fought it was usually for peace
Never for greed or anger
Living in happiness and harmony
With nature and the earth
Respecting death and celebrating birth
Understanding the life of the bear, the fish and crow
The eagle, the beaver and the moose
Knowing things passed down that only the wise men know
When I grow up I want to be an Indian
I know this now for sure
I've decided and made up my mind
In order to seek and to find
My inner most strengths and powers
To put them to use and to change my life
To recover from shame and disgrace
From sad smiles I put on another face
To rebuild from my inside out
Until I feel proud again to go from inside out
I have spent my whole life wondering about
I just need all the things I already know
On my inside to come out
I want to make my own medicine bag
To control what bothers me
I want to make my own walking stick
To help me walk the path ahead
I want to make and beat a drum
I can call my own
To signal and to celebrate
I'll never drum alone
I want to be and Indian
I want everyone to see
To see me as I am on my inside on my out
The Hurons, The Nipissing, and The Mississauga
The Ojibwe, The Odawa, The Temagami too
I see how they all are different
and at the same time just like me and you
But me I want to be an Indian, like a Cree or a Souix
When I grow up I want to be an Indian
I know this now for sure
I met a spirit not long ago
On the Saugeen shore
It's not as though it spoke to me
Or appeared as a spirit ghost
It seemed to guide my mind I think
Is what I remember most
It shone like a bright light in the darkest night
It felt warm like a fire in the morning light
My mind felt like it left had me
And my body was but a host
Tears began to fill up both of my eyes
I felt just like a child again
When I heard her speak
I closed my eyes and all was good
At fifty-five I began my childhood

there is a lot of truth in this poem. I came as an immigrant to Canada as a 5 year old boy in 1959. I was an immediate outcast...I was Hitler, Nazi Boy, Kraut, Killer, etc. I felt so much hate that I knew exactly what other people such as African descendants, and Native or Aboriginals must have felt. For almost 5 years I had to run home or get beat up. So I knew the shortest, longest, quickest, I knew every way home...I always played an Indian when we played outside, and hate to tell you this but my side usually won! They never saw it coming, and soon there were more Indians than cowboys. I'll tell you when I stopped running in another poem.