Conundrum

it's hard to keep secrets
on lips you've kissed
no regrets or remorse
sleeping with the enemy
won't get you out of this
a country without borders
is like a bed without sheets
and who you're fucking
is no longer a mystery
all the words I had
are gone can't you see
it's not what you think
won't you please turn the page back
I've lost my place I'm way off track
it wasn't me

Headache (You're giving me a headache)

you're giving me a headache
I can't take much more
too much confusion
I just wanna close the door
slam it on my feelings
you're talking too much
but you're not saying
anything anymore

you're giving me a headache
I can't take this anymore
why can't things just be
the way they were before
without all this thinking
and talking
we did things just because
there was no reason for
but now...

you're giving me a headache
for which there is no cure
no Tylenol or cocaine
will take away the pain
sometimes I wish that
you would stop talking
and stop me from walking
walking out the door again
and now...

you're giving me a headache
it's so hard to move ahead
when everything you talk about
leads to something already said
mistakes are steps taken
to bring me closer to you
but if you keep talking
there's not much I can do
you're giving me a headache
such a headache
still now...

you're giving me a headache
such a fuckin' headache
like so many times before
you're giving me a headache
what a fuckin' headache
I can't take too much fuckin' more
you're giving me a headache
you're giving me a headache
where's the fuckin door...?

The Old Brown Cow

I guess I must be older now
I can no longer pull the plow
I wonder what will happen now
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

Set to pastures like being set aside
No longer able to keep astride
The cutting edge cuts deep your pride
But still those feelings you must hide

Like a head counted in a herd
Your voice alone cannot be heard
So you speak collectively
You only see what the others see

Is this the way it is when you
Get old and can no longer do
The things you did when you were you
All the things that you used to do

At times you feel alone in crowd
In a place of worship you shout out loud
You were once so strong so proud
Now you`re covered by an aging shroud

You`re in the school yard when someone fell
Now you`re waiting for the bell
Your mind is young your body`s not well
Though you walk tall the young ones can tell

I guess I must be older now
I can no longer pull the plow
I wonder what will happen now
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

I guess we must be older now
Those who can no longer pull the plow
I wonder what will happen now
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

I wonder what will happen now
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

I wonder what will happen now
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow
What ever happened to the Old Brown Cow

feel it

do you feel it
I feel it
do you feel it
I feel it
do you feel it
I feel it too
take my hand
run with me
through the fields
the way we used to do
it has to be real
the way that we feel
let's run till we can't run
anymore
let's run to where
we've never been before
I don't want to rust
or be rooted in place
like a steel bust
of myself
sitting with dust
upon the shelf
for lack of trust
or belief in myself
I need to move
find a new groove
let's hurry together
good or bad weather
while fate allows us
let's bathe in the sound
of the music in our souls
to ourselves redound
no matter whatever may
come or pass our way
this segment, passage
moment in time
will never
be the same again
but is forever
a memory never to feign

7 & 11

rolling seven and eleven
I'm in seventh heaven
and I think you know
I'd sail the seven seas
that's how far I'd go
seven days, seven times one day
tomorrow I'd sail a week
is how long I'd go
till I get weak in the knees
until I can't go any further
won't go any further
without you, please
I have travelled thousands of miles
and endured fates desire
so much before and now all for you
...
the things I know the most about
are the things that I do the best
and the things I know the least about
are the things that put me to the test
I know a lot but not enough
I'm learning everyday
from what I hear and what I see
or from others that pass my way
some of them unfortunately I see on TV
I'm not perfect nor do I want to be
but I do aim to be a better me
I make mistakes like everyone
I'm not ashamed but I've learned
and proud to admit it
a humble stance was never
a comfortable place for me
I always saw things the way I saw them
there was no in between only black and white
eventually, thankfully, luckily
change comes graciously with age
hopefully for you as it did for me
what once was a way of life
is now somewhat unacceptable to me
no longer pleasant for the eye to see
the things I used say I hated
don't seem so bad to me anymore
in fact some of them I now do
while others I still ignore
some things I used to enjoy doing
don't pack the same punch as before
which means I don't wake up
out lit on the cold floor anymore
but then theres things that bother me
the things that make me stop and think
the things I said that echo back to me
I can't believe how hurtful
and how absolutely mean I was
and imagine to be on the receiving end of me
it's hard to live, rightfully so, with guilt so concomitant
it takes the spur out of the moment

for it takes time to heal but allows no clemency
at times it's seems a tad unfair a constant cross to bear
feeling lost when you're already there
always second guessing when you know you're right
always being careful when you're feeling the urge to make a move
it's hard to sit tight when you're blindfolded
but you'll eat a lemon if told to take a bite
it's hard to know you're in it when it's everywhere
try to live life without pain or strife
it's impossible life is incredible
but once lived irreversible
live it fully
be responsible
be sensible
instead of reprehensible
but it's hard to live a perfect life
when your surrounded by so many lies
how can you be true
how can you alone be true
your words and thoughts are wise
but they bring nothing but anger
from those who despise
so pull up your knees and tuck in your chin
the ride gets bumpy from here on in
fear is on the way and fear always changes
as do all things especially the day
we must all wait until night time before calling it a day
how can you be happy if you can't remember a thing
don't be a fool like the fool before you
your life's tied up and held up by a shoe string
it's uphill all the way in the human zoo
where all the animals prey
no language barrier
a grunt is a groan is a bay
and it doesn't matter who you are
or what you say
God Bless you as you go on your way

Love

clouds shatter like glass

frozen tears rain down

the sun has left my sky

and as I continue to die

shards of love

penetrate my armour

cutting deep

through my calloused skin

through my outer layer

slicing deep and cutting

into my pride

without the sun

there are no shadows

no place to hide

love keeps cutting

cutting me deeper inside

I try to keep busy

it seems the harder I try

still I keep my neck a wry

for love keeps me astride

waiting patiently

in subliminal latency

never losing track of me

it has a hook in me

love won't let me be

as far as the eye can see

across the open sea

love reigns on me

as dark as the sky above

try as I may for

forever and day

there is no shelter

or comfort

from ubiquitous love

The tears I cry

you were here before
but you were so young
only 3 years old
I will never forget the look on your little face
the tears in your eyes when I stood and cried
I wished for rain
in the middle of a heat wave
so I wouldn't have to explain
the tears I cry
and sure as rain you asked
and I told you to look
there's Mommy in that big shiny car
as the procession drove by
but now I realize the tears I cry
were tears of pride and tears of love
and I am not embarrassed to cry
when you were not afraid to die
oh how I miss you and love you
oh how I wish you were here
but perhaps you were chosen for a reason
there are reasons and choices for us all
when this reaches you I hope you can hear me
it seems our son has answered the call
and he leaves on Monday so I guess it's true
he is really going after all
he's so big, strong and cunning like you
his voice fills the house and when he's gone
I don't know what I'll do
so please baby when you get this
look over him please
bring him back home
my world would truly end
if I were to loose him too
I love you so much
I know your Mother would have been
very proud of  you
we'll be a world apart
you take care and stay alert
you're not going alone
and just one more thing
please come home