Ownership

Sometimes I find it hard to breathe
I get scared and the world closes in
The room is too small,
there's not enough air
I panic and try hard to maintain focus
To maintain control
But my mind wanders as I cross examine myself
First my ankles
Then my knees
Hips, arms, wrists and shoulders
Neck and back
Then each muscle, joint and tendon
And when I'm all done
There's the inside of me
The insides of a baby
So I've been told
Then how come the rest of me feels
so damn old
So let's travel further inside
To where our secrets reside
Inside our mind, inside our brain
We come face to face
with our fears, troubles and pain
For me it's the night time
Or when I'm alone
We all need a break or time to relax
No down time, no pleasure and no fun for me
When it hurts to lie down,
every joint cracks as you move
It hurts me to pee
But arthritis has befriended me
Of that I am certain
And brought along a friend for me
The last thing I needed
After hepC
Let me introduce to you
the one and only
High anxiety
Oh what would my life be
without high anxiety
Sometimes I find it hard to breathe
I get scared and the world closes in on me
Caught in a web of fear
The more I struggle
The less chance of breaking free
The more I think
The later it gets
It gets too late
I begin to hyperventilate
I cough to clear my throat
To catch my breath
But that cough leads to another
Gagging, coughing, gagging, retching
and puking is next
I no longer have control
My ribs, my back
My head and stomach pay the toll
Twelve hours in the shower
Gravol every hour
Not sure what else to do
As I beg for relief from God
and you